You Get What You Deserve

"It's winter now and to sing and move is good to fight against the temperature," opines Jose Mourinho, in what we can only assumed was a call for more people to watch The X Factor, or possibly a part of the government's drive to cut carbon emissions by reducing the use of central heating.

Shockingly, though, it wasn't either of those, and was instead one of Jose's trademark whines - this week directed at his own club's loyal fans.

"Why don't they sing? They're always quiet. For a team with this record at home, I think the players deserve more support," complained the Portuguese of silent Stamford Bridge.

Who would have thought that buying the league with an unlimited transfer budget, building a team of odious diving cheats and playing boring route one football wouldn't get the crowd going?